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Sunday, October 25, 2020

Things to Know if You Want to Date a Single Father

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Single dads are the most charming set of men in the relationship market.  The first thing a lady thinks when she sees a single, handsome guy with a kid is that he is a gentleman in the right frame of mind.

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Knowing that single dads are clearly available to settle, one would assume that ladies who are looking to tie the knot would be all over these eligible bachelors.

Surprisingly, single fathers are not having it as easy as we think they are. Women are scared of dealing with these group of people for obvious reasons, and we can’t blame these women for their decision.

So, why are single men so appealing yet not getting the kind of attention they want? Well, it’s just because these men are themselves. A lot of ladies think about how much attention single dads would have to give their kids and if they would have time to give them any attention at all, but that isn’t their major fear.

Before we list out all the reasons why ladies flee from single dads,  let us check out a  few reasons why a relationship with a man who has a child/children might work.

  1. If you choose to date a single father, you can be rest assured that he is a responsible man. If he weren’t responsible, you would know from how he relates with his child or children.
  2. Single fathers are usually protective of their kids and if you can connect with the children, trust the father to fall helplessly in love with you.
  3. Single fathers are cautious people. They pay attention to details because they want to be sure everything is OK with their kids and the environment around them. This would, in turn, mean that the single dad would notice everything you do. Ranging from your new clothes to new hairdo, trust to get seen.

What about the downside?

Single Father

Let’s get real; if you want to date a single father, there is no way you are going to escape playing mommy.

Most single fathers who go into a relationship with another woman are actually seeking someone to play the role of a mother to their kids even though they hate to admit it. A lot of us women don’t want to be caught in the mommy web while we are dating and that is one major reason why we run away from single fathers.

Second major turn off?  “Baby mama drama”. That is, without doubt, a scary bridge you must have to cross if you choose to settle for a single father. It is no rumour that baby mamas are in the habit of trying to come between their Exs and the new lady in the picture.

If you are scared of being cheated on, then dating a single dad isn’t for you because single fathers are in the habit of cheating with their baby mamas.


Because the baby mama is connected to the kids, the single dad has to see the mother of his kids from time to time whether he likes it or not because they are joined by the children they share. And you know what they say about old flames, they hardly die.

Have you ever wondered why single fathers don’t date single mothers? That is because some of them have nothing to offer a lady and just really want a nanny who they can also have sex with when they want. Because you are a girlfriend, you can hardly say no to the demands of these men when you are involved with them.

Also, raising children is time-consuming so when you are in love with a single dad, and you have to play mommy, get ready to sacrifice a lot of time as you work with the schedule of your lover’s kids.

Don’t think because he has six figures account he will have money to spend on dates and dinner. Most single dads have to spend money on spouse alimony and sometimes child support so when he says he is broke, he really is.

Oh! He is always going to put his children first so get ready to play second best in his life. Most women might not want to have children yet but when they decide to have kids, they want theirs to be the first so having the children of another woman around may not go down well with them.

You get a lot of “What if’s” in your head if you date a man with kids. You are never sure if you are the only woman, you are never sure if he really loves you, you are never sure what would happen to your relationship if his kids are difficult to tolerate. You just live your life as if something bad might happen the next second and that isn’t healthy for you.

So, if you want to get involved with a man who has children, get ready to face all the challenges listed above. However, don’t be scared to fall in love.

Emmanuella Ekokotu
Ekokotu Emmanuella is a sociologist and Anthropologist, writer, and fashion model who lives in Benin city, Edo state,Nigeria.

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