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Sunday, October 25, 2020

New Study Claims Big Weddings Lead to Happier Marriages

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We live in a world where everybody, especially the females, wants a fairytale wedding; something they can think about and feel like they made the right choice and will have a happily ever after ending.

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However, with several sad occurrences and the increase in divorce rate around the world, people are beginning to drift from the idea of having big weddings that will require them to spend a huge amount of money because they are usually not sure what the outcome of the union will be.

More people are moving towards the angle of having small weddings and sometimes secret weddings without too many guests with the hope that it will help them live a more quiet life free of intrusion and unnecessary expectations from other people.

According to recent research by the University of Virginia people who have larger and more formal weddings are supposedly more likely to have a long-lasting and quality marriage.

The idea behind this is very difficult to believe because as a female I feel there are more challenging and stressful things in a relationship than planning a massive wedding.

The research which is part of UVA’s National Marriage Project took a survey of 418 participants and asked questions about their history as well as the current quality of their matrimony.

The quality of marriage was determined through questions about factors like thoughts about divorce happiness in the relationship as well as how offering the couple confides in one another.

The study revealed that only about 30% of couples who had below 50 guests in their wedding ceremony where enjoying a highly successful marriage on the flip side of the coin it was discovered that 47% of couples who invited over 150 guests to their wedding had a highly solid marriage, but that still is hardly a great success rate.

It is not difficult to assume that individuals who can afford these weddings are more likely to stick together and have better marriages especially because of the sense of security and other benefits that being wealthy allows for. However, the correlations stayed in place regardless of what a couple’s economic status was.

One of the reasons that supposedly might be responsible for such correlation is that having to commit yourself to your spouse in the presence of a large number of people is a big demonstration of how dedicated you are and that in turn would discourage divorce.

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Big Weddings

The thought of getting a divorce when you remember that hundreds of people who you know were present when you made your intention known to spend the rest of your life with someone, kind of deters you from moving forward to call it quits with that same person.

Another factor probably is that for you to have lots of wedding guest, it means the couple enjoys the support of a large number of people.

When the couple has misunderstandings, or they are worried for one reason or another this friends, and family members who were present when their vows were exchanged could serve as a support system for them by providing advice and giving them tips on how to go about handling the problems they are experiencing.

Nevertheless, it is still difficult to bring me to accept the findings of this study because in the present day a lot of couples find it easy to give up their relationships regardless of how much money they spent planning the wedding or how many guests was present at their wedding ceremony.

Sometimes even in the presence of money, basics like love, attention, and other necessary factors that would make a marriage work are usually absent, and that is enough reason for some partners to pull out.

Secondly, the sample size for this study is really small so we cannot be sure that the is 418 people that were used represent the entire population accurately.

Do not also forget the fact that while this particular study was controlled for couples income gender race and religious views, it is quite impossible to account for every prime factor that may help determine the size of a couple’s wedding ceremony.

What their previous relationships were like whether they have children what kinds of family and friends they have and several other circumstantial situations may be capable of seeing a couples marriage quality or ceremony size in significant ways.

And then there is the part where certain couples are just all about having a massive wedding day where they become the center of attraction and attention rather than being genuinely concerned about the vows they will be exchanging and the life they would be spending with this person they have decided to get married to.

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After the big wedding obsession has been satisfied the rest can be considered history as it will be difficult for them to manage and tolerate each other.

I have also come to understand that couples who are more concerned about the quality of life they spend with each other usually do the best they can to reduce the number of people who get involved with their life.

And that includes the number of guests to invite to their wedding the reason for this is that the more people you get involved in your relationship, the more opinions, the more comparisons, and the more complaints that you have to deal with.

Being able to build a life with someone you love would require more than money race or religion it would require tolerance willingness to make things work and most importantly love.

The same way some people who have decided just to elope, have a simple court wedding with only their parents and close family and those who decide just to believe that their marriage will work there are also people who have spent a lot of money getting their wedding done who enjoy a blissful marital life first it will be dangerous to make a generalization a conclusion based on the results of this study.

The only valuable key points that I have deduced from the results of the survey is that compatibility and also effort work together to create a happy marriage, and all of that begin long before the wedding day.

So if a couple have discovered that while dating they can tolerate each other, they love each other, and they’re willing to put in effort regardless of their financial situation then a 7-foot wedding cake or a huge wedding reception is just one of those things they can decide to do without or to enjoy

Emmanuella Ekokotu
Ekokotu Emmanuella is a sociologist and Anthropologist, writer, and fashion model who lives in Benin city, Edo state,Nigeria.

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