Not long ago, I could boast of being in a relationship, but I have found myself single again. For a while I had felt like my relationship want working, but that hasn’t made my breakup any easier.
I must confess I still miss the person I was with, and even more, I miss the idea of us building a life together.
Nevertheless, I am getting into the new life of being single and doing all I can to embrace that rather than being in a hurry to find someone else even though there are a couple of people I have had my eyes on in recent times.
Being a single girl is something almost no female wants to embrace anymore but just maybe there are reasons why one should embrace being single. To help you see respond why you should embrace being single, I have put together ten reasons why it isn’t such a bad thing to be single.
I wasn’t in a long distance relationship so you can imagine how I had to deal with someone checking up on where I was and what I was doing at a specific time. as much as it is a wonderful thing to be part of a couple, there is no denying that there is a mental freedom that comes with being on your own.
I can go out wherever I want and do whatever I want with whoever i want without having to bother about upsetting anyone. time is a precious asset and your time should be 100% to yours.
2. Goodbye to mixed signals
Even though we got to see each other every day, there were so many chances for us to misinterpret each other’s silence or read other meanings to each other’s responses to things.
This goes to show that though these things happen more in a long distance relationship, it can still happen when the both of you spend time together.
Not being sure where you stand in a person’s life can be very challenging and mentally tasking. it can also make you unproductive because you cannot keep track of how much time you spend wondering what you mean to the person or where your relationship is headed.
3. Peace of mind
I’m still very much in love with my ex-boyfriend, and we have never to stay in touch so far, but now I do not have to worry about him as much as I used to, and I can even feel more like myself than worry about changing to please him.
Now I can only worry about him as a friend but I’ll never have to bother about taking in his issues as mine because he doesn’t mean that much to me anymore.
My life and my own issues are important and it would be unhealthy to neglect them and focus on fixing another person’s life.
Once he and I began dating i forgot what it was like to pay attention to myself because i got wrapped up in his entire mess and gave him the right to ruin my peace of mind.
4. Flirting is not entirely a terrible thing
Now I can go to parties and even flirt with people without feeling guilty or feeling like he is watching and would get upset if I smiled too much or even laughed at a stranger’s joke.
There’s always that awkward thing about being in a relationship with someone and meeting someone else that you are attracted to.
You don’t want to lead anyone on, but at the same time you don’t want to always have to talk about your boyfriend and scare a potential suitor away. From now till I meet the next person who hopefully will be the right one, I have every right to flirt and enjoy the attention.
5. Dressing up
When I’m stressed or just lazy, I don’t see any reason to do anything extra to look good. I just think my man is going to love me anyhow he sees me so I can just take a shower, put on any dress I like and spray some deodorant.
I don’t go the extra mile of putting on a lipstick or paying any attention to my bad looking fingernails.
Now, I’m making sure that my manicure and pedicure are done weekly and i have my make up nicely done if I must step out of the house for any reason. Now I’m ditching sneakers and doing all I can to look colourful and girly because it makes me feel beautiful and very happy which is a pretty good thing.
6. A good excuse to go shopping
Luckily for me this isn’t the holiday season so I don’t have to bother about buying gifts for other people. I took it as a challenge to make a list of all the things I need and make sure that I work hard enough to buy every single thing on that list.
I remember how I never thought of getting myself any single thing during the seven years i dates my ex, but I got him excursive gifts every now and then. This is the time where I get to sacrifice for myself and let him worry about himself. We all deserve to be spoilt once in a while, and this time I am spoiling me.
7. This is a time for self reflection
One of my character flaw if my inability to handle criticisms well. There are times when I have tried to behave like an adult and take criticisms when they come but I can’t always be that way.
When I get the feeling that someone is judging me or trying to make me feel less than myself I get defensive and even yell.
That happened a couple of times between my ex and I and wasn’t something interesting. Even though he was in the habit of complaining about every single thing I did or choices I made, this is just a time for me to think of why I reacted the way I did those times. It will help me be a better person so I can grow.
8. City hopping
My ex and I used to play around with the idea about places where we would love to move to and maybe live for a couple of years. Some of those thoughts were more practical than others.
Now that he and I are over, I can begin to take steps to travel from one city to another or even relocate to a different country. I know I’m ready for a break and it’s what’s best for both my physical and mental well-being.
9. Letting the world know
I always felt like my ex was ashamed of me because he left his relationship status as single on Facebook and would rather upload photos of other females than have my picture on his page. It was really frustrating because I let the world know there was someone in my life and I loved him very much.
Now that it’s all over I can think more clearly and it is obvious that he never really loved me but stayed around because of what he was getting. I can now let the world know I’m single and make the right moves to see that my best relationship is kept a secret till I’m sure he is with me for the right reasons.
I’m not in a rush to start having sex again especially because I have had some of the craziest kind of sex while I still had my EX. But even though I am willing to wait for the right person, I still think about having sex sometimes.
I have thoughts about who the next person I’ll sleep with will be and if the sex is going to be as good as what i had or even better. Some people believe that if you jump start your sex life, you can easily get over someone, and though I’ll take the chance when it comes, I do not want it to be a fling, and I want it to be mind-blowing.
Dealing with a breakup and going from being in a relationship to becoming single again isn’t an easy thing. However, giving yourself a chance to enjoy this new life is a step in the right direction if you really want to heal before going into a new relationship.
So now I’m moving on one day at a time, and these are the positive things I can say I enjoy, I’ll love to know what you think.